Doing the same thing over and over is insanity!

 A new year is upon us - let's hope that this year will be significantly better than 2020. However, whilst we dealt with COVID  (and many countries are still in the midst of it) we do have to acknowledge to ourselves the things that were positive for us - it gave us a chance to reflect on what is really important to us and then to start making those changes. But how long did it take before we fell back into the same rut as before? Did we create any new habits and actually sustain them - or did life get in the way and we found ourselves back doing the same thing over and over. 

Doing the same thing over and over and expecting a different result is something we have all heard of. In fact the saying usually has the word "Insanity" at the start. If we truly want to change something we actually have to do something straight way to make it happen. We can't just accept that it will happen for us - we need to practice it and put the time into it. For instance if we want a job promotion we have to work at it - either by upskilling ourselves, or gaining qualifications, or finding out what we need to do. 




Habits in our personal life can be hard to break - and there is no quick fix to a lifetime of habits that we then want to break. But if we want to break some habits we have to work at it. This is where our brain is so clever! 

Habits develop over time and just as we learn them we can unlearn them. Habits are a combination of all sorts of things - mainly the environment and the people that we are around all the time. If we surround ourselves by people who find the negative in everything, sooner or later we start sounding and looking at the negative. If we form a positive relationship with an environment (may be the gym, or a space at your workplace, or the beach or the river) then we find we develop positive habits. 

So how do we change a habit we don't like? Our brain is wired with our neural pathways (I explain to the kids it looks like some sort of highway) where the stronger the pathway the more we do it. The brain thrives on habits ares they make us feel safe and secure. But the problem with our brain is that it resists change strongly! Bad habits are not something to be seen as a weakness , or a lack of control. It's just that the habits are hard wired and the brain doesn't want to change that wiring quickly. The brain will do everything in its power to delay the start of a new habit - think about trying to go on a diet. The brain will remind you of everything else that it has coming up (like a holiday or a birthday) so that you find reasons not to develop the new habit that you wish to find. 

The brain encodes all our habits so that when situations arise it is ready to use it. This is where a change in environment is so important - change the environment, change the habit. As James Clear discusses - once a habit is encoded the urge to act follows whenever the environment cues appear. But you can change a habit that you really want to - but it will take work. The only problem, according to Clear, is that you are unlikely to ever forget that habit. They are nearly impossible to remove. 

So...how to break those pesky habits. A number of habits experts suggested the following: 

  • Cut the bad habit off at the source 
So this means if its the habit of not getting work done because you keep looking at your phone - leave your phone at home  OR 
Eating that whole tub of ice cream at 9 o'clock at night - instead try having a cup of tea instead 

  • Find out what triggers the habit 
Stop and look each time you do your bad habit and ask yourself what part of your environment triggers it. Then start attaching a new behaviour to the trigger. 

  • Keep it small and simple! This would be the one I would suggest the most. Make sure it is really going to have some sort of impact for you and will make a difference in your life. For instance if you are someone who struggles to be at work on time it may be as simple as getting up 5 minutes earlier each day for a week , and then 10mins the next week and so on. 
  • Focus on changing the habit around a significant event such as a holiday or a new year. This provides motivation, focusing thoughts on a single point in time

  • Lastly repeat it over and over and over again. This is the only way that you can make a new pathway in the brain. It may take a week, it may take a month, it may take 3 months - but keep repeating it until you have broken that habit. 
Some excellent books to read further about this is 

Atomic Habits by James Clear
Tiny Habits by BJ Fogg
Dark side of the Brian by Lance Burdett 

Until next week , enjoy breaking some of the old habits. 







Comments

Popular posts from this blog

Smashing barriers

Brene Brown Braving - a useful tool!

Challenging Conversations