Curiosity - the Superpower

 

“Remember to look up at the stars and not down at your feet. Try to make sense of what you see and wonder about what makes the universe exist. Be curious. And however difficult life may seem, there is always something you can do and succeed at.
It matters that you don't just give up.”
― Stephen Hawking

This week I've been reading the book "The Advice Trap : Be humble, stay curious and change the way you lead forever." The majority of this book I understand from all the work that I do in coaching and the readings that I do linked to coaching. As a coach we need to be curious. We have to ask the questions without giving the advice. It's something that we have to practice - and master. We so often want to fix the problem, to jump in and give our two cents (especially when we can easily see the solution). But this doesn't help the person that we are working with. Our job is to help them come up with their own solutions, their own ahaha moment. 

So why is curiosity important? 



Great minds of our time have one thing in common - their ability to be passionately curious.  Albert Einstein, Stephen Hawking and Steve Jobs are all fine examples of what being curious can lead to. Their ability to keep searching, asking the questions, resilience, and being able to tap into their intuition all led to great innovations of our time. And there are countless others that I'm sure you can tap into. 

Curiosity is like a superpower. When you realise that curiosity leads to other great things such as empathy, mindfulness and humility why would you not want to develop this superpower? By engaging with curiosity in a deliberate, repeatable behaviour these three virtues can emerge naturally. 

An obsession in our current climate of mindfulness can be reframed with curiosity as a centre - how can we be more situationally aware? You can ask yourself daily - What do I believe? How could I be wrong? What do I know to be true? These questions all make us more curious but also mindful. Try using one of them - I really love the what do I know to be true (this links so nicely with the work done by Bryon Katie) . 

By using curiosity empathy emerges. This is about being more aware of others, of being present to who they are, to having an awareness to the way we respond to the world around us. It's the exchanges we have with others and how we try to understand more fully from their side - remember we all tell our own stories in our heads. Being curious helps unpack that. 

Humility will also emerge as we become more curious in our way of engaging with others. We are constantly learning and come from a different detached point that help us appreciate the different perspectives of others. Asking yourself the everyday question of "who am I at my best?" reminds us to acknowledge not only our own strengths but others around us, and also acknowledges the virtues of improved relationships, tolerance, the openness to new possibilities (imagine if Enstien hadn't been open to new possibilities). 

So what else can curiosity do for us?

- Problem Solving: It can improve our problem solving - we ask better questions, we come up with new and innovative ways of doing things, we delve deeper, we become more resourceful.

- Overcoming fears: When we are curious we begin to feel ok with being uncomfortable, with facing new challenges. We need to feel uncomfortable to learn -this in turn helps us develop our growth mindset (see the work of Carol Dweck). 

- Knowledgeable  The more knowledge that we build the more resources we have to tap into to to help us become more curious about our next step of learning. 

- Self Aware: We begin to question our beliefs, our values, our perceptions on life. We are  more willing to experiment, to try out new things, to find out what works and what doesn't. We look at ourselves more deeply and question who we are, who we are becoming, and how we can improve to better ourselves. We ask ourselves where do our beliefs come from - how are they true? How can I change to improve myself? 

So my question and challenge to you: 

How can you start being more curious? Is it trying something new? Is it writing a journal and questioning yourself? Is it listening more to others, and asking the right questions. I love the question "and what else?" - really probing into what the person is really trying to tell us. Is it taking a walk down to the river and really just being curious about the nature around us? Is it (in my case) thinking through every movement in the gym and being curious about what is happening when I'm lifting my weights. 

Be curious. Be like a child , (yes there is a reason they ask the question why, why, why so many times...) When was the last time you took some time to really be curious about something - not just asking the question and not listening but because you are passionate and wonder?  And like Stephen Hawking said " Don't give up". 

Until next week. 






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